Finding positive things doesn't happen immediately. Actually it can take quite a while. While dealing with this type of loss you must train yourself to try to think of at least one thing positive a day. Also, positive memories of your child may help as well.
There is no better medicine (other than having your child back in your arms) than being able to smile while thinking of your child. A great thing to try is a memory jar. Every thing that you loved about you child , his/her personality, fun times write them down separately on different pieces of paper. Have family and friends help as well. Once the memories have been written down, fold the pieces of paper and put them in a jar. When ever those rough periods of sadness hit. Get the jar out and read some of the comments. Though these memories can be bittersweet memories, they help reroute some of the pain.
Other ways to help with pain is helping others. It is amazing how much better you feel when you turn that pain/anger/anxiety into something positive. There are plenty ways to help others. I have found organizations to help other parents who have lost children, charities in hospitals, as well as helping the sick and elderly. There are causes all over the internet, all over facebook, pinterest, etc. When I participate in these things, applying not just work/ labor but putting my heart into what I do, it brings a warmth and healing. You also meet amazing people in the process and hey may also offer healing and perspective as well. (That's the extra bonus!)
Yes, there are still days where these things may not help, and that's okay too. Be gentle with yourself. There are no expectations. But with time things will get better...
Peace and blessings to you all!
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